Friday, February 25, 2011

New Thought's

I liked to draw when I was younger.
I knew I wasn't great. But I thought I was ok. Someone I respected told me I wasn't and I was young enough I believed that.
But I can take a pretty darn good picture with my bag o camera's. I can do hand work and keep my hands employed most times.

Recently I decided it was time to challenge some of the old memories that I play in my head. I have taken some time to pick up a pencil to doodle...I tried my hand at water color...it wasn't good. I'll leave that to Tiny Dancer. Then a friend of mine brought a canvas over and said "lets paint!". I wasn't sure what to paint...but I gave it a shot.
Her encouragement boosted my self esteem a little...enough that a determined little seed was planted in my head. 
Smack Dab in the middle of the old thought that had taken up residence so long ago. Burrowing in like a tick infestation, deep into my belief system...and I dared to...talk my daughter into trying with me.

She is amazing!!

I am...happy with my efforts. Enough that I'm still going :) With the goal of finishing this week end...fur sur!



Then I shall add, "Art-teast extraordinare" to my calling card.


For true success ask yourself these four questions: Why? Why not? Why not me? Why not now?
                      James Allen "As A Man Thinketh"

Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so you shall become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.       James Allen "As A Man Thinketh"


"Cherish your visions; cherish your ideals; cherish the music that stirs in your heart, the beauty that forms in your mind, the loveliness that drapes your purest thoughts, for out of them will grow delightful conditions, all heavenly environment; of these if you but remain true to them, your world will at last be built."
                                       -- James Allen, Author of "As a Man Thinketh"

Monday, February 21, 2011

February Snows

     The skies sure seem to be a more beautiful shade of blue when contrasted with the brilliant white of snow. But then the snows begin to melt, the skies begin to beckon, warming you to venture out your door to grab a rake, daring to encourage your grass to wake up...only to find the next morning bringing you a fresh cover of powder.

It's ok.
February snows melt off fast.
     A few more day's of warm sunshine through the South window's and you begin anew to dream Summer dreams...
     Then one night, February plays a trick on you. It shows you that the February Snows are not to be mocked and so it begins...flakes as large as tea saucers, fluffy as goose down from a broken pillow, begin floating gently from above. Converging to create drifts that cover the lane and you find yourself, snowed in, once again.
     It seems that every snow season ends with a few really good snow storms after all.
    
Bringing out the children who love to play in the last snows almost as much as the first.


      Adults stand looking out at the building depths vowing not to go out to work snow removal duty. Because everybody knows... February Snows melt off fast.
     This last storm was a doozy, it blew in sideways on a stiff wind, sticking to the South side of everything!
     By the next morning it was painfully obvious that it would be around for a while. As flakes of various sizes continued in equally various tempo's to waft through the February skies, one man stood firm in his resolve to let It melt off. One man was able to try out his end of season purchase of a big red snow blower. (You can tell the new ones because they do almost all the way around the block the first few times).
     With these last storms the winds pick up, noses turn red from the chill just running to the mail box, going out is dreaded. At night those same dancing winds moans around corners, tipping the last of the snow laden trees as jack Frost flits around the windows of houses and cars, painting his crystals as thickly as he can...
     Sitting on the heater with a blanket and a book I keep telling myself with a chuckle, February Snows melt off fast...
     One man confesses that maybe he should have removed snow this one last time, then corrects himself quickly and resolutely... February Snows should melt off, and this one will, sometime.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

To Panic Or Not To Panic...

Google search for Pain and Panic picture from Hercules movie 


It's not really a question. It's more of a...well...a...no, it's more like a...Well lets just say if you haven't had the pleasure of experiencing one, it's as hard to describe.as a flavor or sent, to someone who has never experienced it. It just isn't easy.

Let me try...I know what they feel like.
Unfortunately we are often on intimate speaking terms...I can usually tell when they are coming on~sort of like one of my migraines~That's when I try to kick into self protection mode.

I need to make it clear here, that I'm only talking about Panic at this time, not 'fight or flight'...that's a whole other ball game. Whyyyee...to clear people or things out of your way when your just trying to get the heck outta Dodge, and head straight for your 'safe place'? You seem to have the strength of ten Grinch's, plus two!!!

Deep breath. Let it out slow...sorry. 

Back to panic...
I remind myself to breathe~Carefully working to undo the intricate origami I seem to try to fold myself into around my heart~breathe~in through the nose, out through the mouth...that's it...

And did I mention breathe?

It is very important.

I tend to hold my breathe, a lot, when panic or anxiety are lurking about the wee hours of the morning and slipping into the day light hours.

I'm lucky, mine is not usually the bratty kind of panic that needs medication to tame. Although...I do know that one intimately as well.

These days my panic is more along these lines...

Panic attack, I thought I got rid of you once and for all~
What?
A lesson to teach?
A lesson to learn?
No thank you please, to all that lesson talk above.
What's that you say?
No choice?
Wait!!!
Let me center!
No fair! Your hitting below the belt again!
What's that you say? I can't seem to understand you... 
Stop laughing so I can hear you...please...!
'Your lesson, is to learn to center, while in the blur of panic.' I hear whispered on the still air...that suddenly is trying to  heavily crush me from all sides.
Then again from the quiet place I hear "Let go, and trust me, we can do it, together."
OK~sure. I can do that.
It sounds easy enough...
Wait!!!
Where did the floor go!?!?

I do have to admit that panic has an uncanny way of forcing me to look closely at what is going on in my life, change what I can, see what I can't, and get a grip on the difference.


For more information about anxiety
and panic attack as explained "by the book" , this one does a pretty good job of it.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Decoy's and Dragon's

Decoy ~ -noun: Bait or trap, anything used as a lure.



     If a decoy* is used to lure something into danger, then it only stands to reason, that there is something or someone who is using these decoy's to do the luring...I'm looking for Dragon decoy's.

     Because I have a few unruly dragons that have been lurking around that I would like to slay.

     What sort of dragons could possibly be lurking around my world?
You might be surprised! And yet again to know that they just keep coming...big, little, fire breathing, flyer's, creepers, crawlers...a wide verity really, they usually tend to raise their heads when I least expect them.
  
Tricky buggers anyway!

     They come in the form of worry, fear, tiredness, regret, what ifs, loss of loved ones, dream eaters...you get the idea, because I'm guessing you have a few dragon's of your own, filling the skies in the kingdoms where you live, work and try to sleep too.

     So I was thinking I could use a dragon decoy and trap them all and clear them out of my Provence for at least a week or two.
Is there a store? Maybe on line? Surely someone on etsy has a shop that sells them. I hope they aren't to expensive-

Maybe I could make my own.

Sure I could, I'm resourceful!

But then where would I put such a thing, really?

     Certainly not out in the yard! Why, people would drive by and see I'm having dragon problems and want to come charging to my aide, thinking they know best how to sleigh them for me, not knowing what they are really looking for, that brings it's own air of mayhem to the arena. Or, stand around and gawk, waiting for the carnage. And worst yet, you know, there would always be the ones to run off spreading the dragon alert from a blow horn or facebook, with morbid glee.

So the yard decoy is out.

     Upon further reflection, a dragon doesn't need a decoy~they just come as they please...so why go looking for trouble?!
I guess instead I'll have to resort to strengthening my waning* stores of fortitude*

Hello self~help library!

     I have slain a fair share of dragon's in my life time, only supposing there will be some who resurrect much like the fabled Phoenix, and they may bring friend's, you just never know. I have a strong hunch that there will be bigger, newer dragon strains evolving, that will come to test my aging mettle*.

     I'm armed with the fact that I have been the conquering heroine* in the past, I know where to go for support, those trusted few on my dragon sleighing team, I know where to go for the necessary training and weaponry*...

     I think it's safe to say I'll leave the decoys to the duck and goose hunter's and go enjoy my clear skies...while I can.

Hope all is well in your corner of the Kingdom!



Fortitude ~ –noun: mental and emotional strength in facing difficulty, adversity, danger, or temptation courageously.

Waning ~ –verb: to decrease in strength, intensity, etc.
 Mettle ~ –noun: courage and fortitude, disposition or temperament.



Heroine ~ --noun: a woman of distinguished courage or ability, admired for her brave deeds and noble qualities.

Weaponry ~ --noun:  weapons or weaponlike instruments collectively.

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Gift I'm Giving Myself

So this past weekend I got the bright idea to try something new. Something I haven't really done seriously before, and like any good mother I drug a couple of family members along with me on this adventure! (With plans to get a few more in on it a.s.a.p.)
And an adventure it is proving to be!
A fun, wonderful, expressive adventure...

I have used these sort of things since I was four years old and my mom started teaching me I could do things with them...


I have done a lot of ceramic's, because that was one of the things she loved doing. Through the years I have ventured in that direction, dragging my family along with me, in the hopes that they might find a way to express themselves.
They are all very artistic, it's just that some of us don't trust ourselves with it yet.
Mom also did beautiful drawing and painting, she was a very gifted woman in many aspects.

When I was a lot younger, I did a drawing, pencil sketch actually, in my youthful exuberance I thought I had done a pretty good job with it, and so, I showed it to my youngest older brother, who has amazing skill's of his own. I was so proud as I showed it to him, not knowing that he wasn't in a good place to give critique or validation to anyone. As I tore up the picture and cried into my pillow, I unknowingly allowed a thought to wedge itself firmly into my mind and unfortunately believed for many years.

But this year.

Because it is The Year Of The Dreamer.

And I am finding that old ideas and memories have been controlling me long enough, I took the paint brushes firmly in hand, and promptly set them aside and dove in!! Don't feel bad for the paint brushes, they are being used, just not like I have ever used them before...

And it is fun!!!

Here is a peek at what I started...


When the old memories sound track starts blaring in my mind, I stop them short by allowing myself to feel them, then excuse them so I can make new ones...because I can! 

And so can you!!

What gift of love can you give yourself for Valentine's Day?

Thursday, February 10, 2011

If...

Have the *Ifs* been bugging you as much as they have me lately?

If you had some free time, what would you do with it?

If you could do anything in the world, knowing you would not fail, what would you do?

If you could stretch your imagination, reach for that illusive dream...


I'm a little stuck in the muck of life right now...I'm trying to figure out why, then give myself a really awesome and inspiring pep talk...

I have noticed that I haven't been getting my camera's out as much as I like to. I'm behind on a few very important projects with more lining up all the time...I have been thinking that maybe I should run away for a day, to regroup...to go out on a limb...

I need to put on my Super Grammy Cape and go try out some of those *ifs* on my list...
If I want to give my end of Winter life a little shake up...put my lagging imagination back to work...continue to dream those possible dreams...then I could shake these doldrums's quick fast and in a hurry.

I'm In!!!



If = conjunction- in case that; granting or supposing that; on condition that: Even though: When or whenever.
Noun: Uncertain possibilities: a condition, requirement, or stipulation.

Doldrums's = Noun- a state of inactivity or stagnation, a dull, listless, depressed mood; low spirits.

For a little more fun check out these words on the Thesaurus, then try to fit them into a conversations and writings...Words are GREAT!

Peace Rose

Sometimes we just need a peace rose.

Grammy's having a 'cranky day'.
Sometimes that's bound to happen.
I don't like it when I have these sort of day's.
So I better go figure out how to turn it around...

Wish me luck.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Journals


 


I have kept journal's for a lot of years now...I don't really remember the reason I started keeping them...but I have.
I am finding that a lot of my photography is involved with my journaling too. I like that.
Recently a "new kind of journaling" came to my attention.
I'm sure it's not new, but it is new to me.

So I set out to gather an art book-water color paints, graphite pencils...and all the things I thought I might need. Then I set to work. I am in the baby steps of it, but I find it pretty interesting...Because sometimes what I set out to do is interrupted by what needs to be done.

I'm learning some interesting things about myself.

If this is some thing you already do~Wooo Whoo!! Keep it up!!
If it is some thing new to you... here are some ideas to help light your imagination...just click on one of the sites listed below and so see some of what I'm talking about...

My favorite site for art journaling...so far


Art journal ideas


kick start your art journal


art journaling 101


Art journal pictures



“Journal writing is a voyage to the interior”
Christina Baldwin quotes



Sometime in your life you will go on a journey.
It will be the longest journey you have ever taken.
It is the journey to find yourself.

Katherine Sharp





Tuesday, February 1, 2011

My Own Drummer

     The other day a wonderful lady, I have known since before I was born, told me I, "haven't changed much from when I was a little kid running around, no bigger than this." (Measured the height of mid~thigh on an eighty year old woman). "You have always just been...well...you. Always knowing who you are. Marching happily along to your own band."
     I asked if she didn't mean 'my own drummer'?
     "Oh no!" She laughed, "You have always had the whole band with you!" She patted my shoulder adding, "I have always envied you in that."

        Just last week I re~met a couple of girl's I grew up with...
     Ok, It was more like the universe got us together to, laugh ourselves silly, down memory lane. Along with the fact that we are now our mother's!
     Riiiight!!!
     None of us saw that one coming...at all! 

     It was at that chance meeting of childhood friends that I learned that I...
    
     Wait for it...
    
     Taught one of them "the most important fashion tip...of her life!"
(Her word's...cross my heart!)

     She recalled how I had sat with her and taught her the fine art of...sock rolling. Knee sock's, or ankle socks, were being worn rolled down around our ankles to form "doughnuts", and she couldn't get the hang of it, so she had been folding hers down. She told of how I didn't give up or loose patience, until she 'got it', and that it was so important to her that she still remembers.

     Then we laughed over this picture...Can you guess where I am?
      Yes indeedly~do...that is me in the sailor dress.
     Now don't be to hasty in thinking I'm not lady~like...I had just gotten my first pair of Big Girl shoes and didn't want to take a chance of them not being seen, admired, and appreciated to the fullest extent!
     (Note the groovy rolled sock's please).
     Teacher tried to get me to sit like the other's. She tried to stand me on the back row, but I kept hanging a leg over the bench. Obviously she gave up and...viola! Everyone could, can, and will, see those inspirational shoes.
     They were black leather with a gold buckle on the side that swiveled, allowing the strap to be worn over the foot (as seen) or to be slid to the back of the shoe, around the heel.                        Becoming...Slip~on's!!!
     They were so darn special that I kept them in Mom's closet next to her black Sunday~go~to~meeting shoes!


So in 'Lurking' back, I see my old longer than life neighbor hood friend is right...


     I do indeed love marching through my life to the beat of my own band !


We have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it, than any other person can be.
~Jane Austen




Think positively about yourself.... ask God who made you to keep on remaking you.
~Norman Vincent Peale



 
The words "I am" are potent words; be careful what you hitch them to. The thing you're claiming has a way of reaching back and claiming you.
~A.L. Kitselman


Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!
~Audrey Hepburn